Show them some respect and appreciation in a cool, laid back, and totally awesome way. You might encourage them to smile, chuckle, or even Hive Five you back! :-)
Yes, I realize that the High Five is a corny, jocular, and conspicuously casual holdover from 1970's popular culture. I realize, and you should as well, that the High Five is not appropriate in all situations.
Don't High Five the person who just gave you a job interview.
Don't High Five your minister (unless he or she is a Unitarian, in which case you needn't worry about it).
Don't High Five the doctor who just performed your prostate exam.
Don't High Five people in a corporate boardroom...unless, of course, you're the Chairman of the Board and you're trying to lighten up a stiff and domineering image.
Why Five???
The High Five sends a powerful message.
The High Five says, "I respect you."
The High Five says, "You've been accepted."
The High Five says that you just did an admirable job and that your efforts not only were noticed, they are appreciated.
The High Five says that you're valued. What could be better? (Other than an envelope full of money. But the IRS would be all over that.)
Positive Reinforcement
The world is drowning in negative feedback. Arguments. Friction. Bad vibes. Turf wars. Intimidation. Threats. Lawsuits. Profane gestures.
Everyone can use some positive reinforcement. If you're the one person who's treating people BETTER than they expect to be treated, you'll stand out. They get some recognition, and you get some recognition. Win-win!
And While You're At It?
Why stop at a High Five? Once you've completed your High Five mission, give someone a well-deserved but unexpected compliment.
Look around. Someone in your sphere of influence probably did something helpful for you lately. Tell them how much you appreciate their contribution or how much you value their opinion/reliability/friendship/expertise/etc. Catch them off guard and enjoy their reaction.
Go For The Trifecta!
You're on a roll! You've given one person a fun High Five. You've paid someone else a thoughtful compliment. Now it's time to DO something.
Yes, really DO something. Do something for someone, and do it unexpectedly. Any small but thoughtful gesture will do.
Bring them a bagel on the morning when they have back to back meetings.
If you notice that they're not feeling well, offer to walk their dog or pick up their dry cleaning.
Pick up a book of their favorite puzzles from the newsstand.
An unexpected act kindness can be affirming and heart-warming - for both of you!
You shouldn't expect thanks or a particular reaction - remember that you're not doing these for praise, you're giving of yourself freely and generously. But don't be surprised if the person says that they really needed that little dose of kindness this week. Receiving a small gift is almost as rewarding as knowing that you did something nice for someone.
The Plan
So, here's the plan. Over the next seven days -
- Give someone a High Five.
- Pay someone a thoughtful compliment.
- Do something for someone unexpectedly.
Who knows? These small acts of kindness might inspire additional positive actions. Any time that we break the cycle of negativity, even in a small way, we have a chance to change the course of events in a positive direction well into the future.
This won't happen every time. Some people will receive your positive words or acts or gestures and they won't pass them forward. Maybe they're too busy. Or forgetful. Or jaded. It doesn't matter. Make the attempt. Not every attempt will succeed in uplifting your intended recipients, but each one will uplifting YOU. A positive and energetic YOU can make a real difference in people's lives. So, even if some of your efforts are met with suspicion or confusion, realize that in total, they're contributing to the greater good.
I'm going to give you a virtual, online High Five just for reading this far. No, get out there and pass it on! :-)
Copyright © 2014 Daniel R. South
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