Farewell 2025

In 2024, I took a bold step toward furthering my education. As 2025 draws to a close, I'm exactly halfway through the program.

The challenges have been significant but so have the rewards. The experience has given me a new perspective on how I spend my time and what I can accomplish when I work really hard.

I'm eagerly looking ahead toward taking more classes and, if I'm blessed to live that long, graduating and putting this knowledge to use in my career.

Our lives exist in a larger context, however, and the backdrop to these small successes has been even more challenging.

For the first time in my long life, the biggest threat to my country comes not from foreign adversaries but from our own leadership. They like gluttonous termites gobbling up everything for their own enrichment while weakening the very structures that have supported and protected us for so long. There's no safe harbor, no institution they won't dismantle, no rule that they won't break if doing so serves their own interests.

We have raised a desperate plea for help from Pest Control, but unfortunately, their first available appointment is three years away. It's hard to imagine what will be left if the termites keep munching unchecked for three more years.

We live in dangerous times. Wars rage on. Research has been defunded. Corruption has been embraced as official policy. Disease prevention and climate protection have been derailed by special interests. Investors have done well as democracy crumbles, but how long will it be before that bubble bursts? 

It's hard to be optimistic, but we have to keep going. We have to keep fighting and hoping that our efforts will be enough to get things back on track. When our personal ambitions are subject to the whims of a corrupt and malicious government, we have no freedom at all.

Crossings

I crossed the river

The raging water

I crossed that river

For you

I looked out over

The perilous current

And grappled with

What I should do

I crossed again

Though fear remained

I focused

And found

My way through

I crossed that river

Over and over

Always

To be with you

© 2025 Daniel South

All Rights Reserved

Wasting Time

Wasting Time

Is not a

Crime

But it

Takes

What cannot be

Replaced

Why I Quit Drinking

I quit drinking

In part

Because it makes me pee

I makes me pee a lot

And once I get started

I have to go

Frequently

One night

When I was drinking

With my friends

They took me

To your house

And they made me pee

On your car

They peed, too

I wasn't just me

We all peed on your car 

But I'm pretty sure

That I peed the most

I remember them finishing

And then remarking

How long

I peed on your car

Anyway

Clearly those guys

Didn't like you

So we all lined up

And peed on your car

And because we were drinking

We peed a lot

I peed a whole lot

I thought my bladder

Was going to explode

But they told me

No

I had to wait

They were going to take me

To your car 

And I had to pee on it

Anyway

That's not why

I quit drinking

I didn't feel bad

For peeing on your car 

They wanted me

To do it

It seemed to mean

A lot to them 

And I thought

It was kind of funny

I didn't know you

But you seemed like a jerk

By all accounts

So it made sense

That they wanted me

To pee

On your car

I was okay with it

No

I stopped drinking

Months later

For reasons

That I won't go into here

But I did stop drinking

Eventually

And I did pee on your car

Although only one time

And it felt good

It felt really good

Because I really had to go

I mean

I was seeing stars

I had to go so bad

So I'm glad

They finally

Let me pee

When we got

To your car 

© 2025 Daniel R. South

All Rights Reserved

Holiday Humor - 2025

Holiday Humor - 2025

What did the grumpy pine tree say when he was planted next to a maple tree?

Leaf me alone!

What did the pine tree say when the bigger pine trees teased him?

Stop needling me!

How does a wreath say goodbye to his wreath friends?

See you around!

Rudolph read Santa's mail. This made Santa angry. What did he say?

Stop being so nosy!

What do you call the friend who insists that you sing Christmas songs together?

Carol.

What do you call the friend who insists on decorating early?

Holly.

Why does Santa prefer milk and cookies?

Because eggnog and fruitcake taste terrible.

How did the dog try to alert his family that Santa Claus had arrived?

Roof! Roof!

Why does Santa come down the chimney?

To get past the doorman.

Who is in charge of decorating the Christmas tree?

The branch manager.

Why didn't Scrooge ever see the spirits again?

They ghosted him.

Why is the Grinch green?

He ate the fruitcake.

© 2025 South of Someplace

A Brief History of The Files

A Brief History of The Files

January: We're releasing the files!

March: Tell the FBI to drop what they're doing and review the files.

April: Oh, cr*p!

May: We've reviewed ALL of the files. There's nothing to see here.

September: We're not going to let you force us to release the files. Hey, Mike, cancel Congress, please!

November: Okay, we would release the files, but there are so many. We have to review them. (You said you did that already.)

December: Oops! We just found a million new files! We'll need time to review those files, too. (What happened to "we've reviewed all of the files?")

The Difference Between Dating and Marriage - A Guide for Men

The Difference Between Dating and Marriage

 

 

DATING

She doesn’t want you to fix the problem.

She wants you to understand how the problem makes her feel.

She wants you to empathize with what she’s going through.

She wants to know that she can count on your emotional support while she works through this.


MARRIAGE

She wants you to fix the problem.

She’s been asking you for months, and you still haven’t fixed it.

“We’re not going to hire someone. It’s a waste of money. You need to fix it.”

“I should have married Frank,” she thinks to herself. “He would have had it fixed by now.”

“Maybe I should call Frank.”

Waiting for Godot - An Interpretation

Lucky represents the working class, the proletariat. Restricted by his oppressive employer, he remains mostly silent, but when he’s unshackled and permitted to speak, he is thoughtful and perplexingly eloquent.

Pozzo represents the bourgeoisie, the capitalists, the business owners, politicians, those with wealth and influence. He’s a larger than life figure, loud, arrogant, and pompous. He’s vain and openly seeks compliments.

Pozzo justifies his chronic mistreatment of Lucky, believing that Lucky is better off despite the harsh terms of his decades long employment. Pozzo has no respect for Lucky and no sympathy. He views his servant primarily as an asset, a commodity. He muses about “getting a good price for him” at “the market”.

Vladimir and Estragon represent us as we grapple with life’s macro decisions. What should we do? Where should we go? Should we part or stay together? Should we give up or keep going? What is there to live for?

When asked where he’s been, Estragon, who represents a subtly feminine perspective, explains that he slept in a ditch - perhaps a metaphor for “the gutter” - where he is assaulted by numerous attackers. Vladimir, who represents the masculine perspective, says, “I could have protected you.”

“No you couldn’t,” argues Estragon. “There were ten of them.”

“I could have stopped you from doing what you did,” Vladimir argues, perhaps hinting at Estragon engaging in flirtation or prostitution, or simply putting himself in a bad situation.

“I think we would be better off if we went our separate ways,” argues Estragon.

“You always say that,” Vladimir counters, “and then you come crawling back.”

Vladimir and Estragon are bewildered when Pozzo and Lucky arrive. They’re dazzled by Pozzo’s swagger and shocked by his cruelty toward Lucky. When Pozzo seems high and mighty, Estragon begs him for ten francs. Later, when misfortune befalls Pozzo and his status is reduced, Estragon won’t lift a finger to help him for less than two-hundred francs.

The name Pozzo is an interesting choice. Does it represent possibilities, i.e. entrepreneurship? Is he a poseur, one who seeks to influence others with charm and bravado? Pozzo’s eventual downfall is sudden and precipitous, yet we feel no empathy for him, only a shred of pity.

The final character to appear, the boy, represents hope and a reassuring innocence. Things may not have worked out today, but surely they will tomorrow.

Vladimir and Estragon, frustrated by the news that the boy brings, nevertheless take solace in the promise of a better tomorrow.

“Waiting for Godot,” starring Alex Winter and Keanu Reeves, is playing at the Hudson Theater in New York City.

Good Deeds, New York Style

Last week, I did a good deed, or at least part of a good deed.

As I was walking to catch a subway, a small, middle-aged lady approached me and asked where she could catch the PATH train. PATH is a rail system that connects Manhattan with nearby cities in New Jersey. Gesturing forward, I told her that the station was close by, across the next street.

We both began walking in that direction, not together, but we were both going the same way. I could hear the sound of her suitcase rolling along the sidewalk. The suitcase was fairly large.

When we reached the intersection, I pointed across the street. "Just go down those stairs."

The lady asked whether the station had an elevator; I admitted that I didn't know. I asked her if she needed help, but she said that the suitcase was heavy and suggested that we might be able carry it down the stairs together.

Once we'd crossed the street, I asked again if she'd like me to carry her suitcase downstairs. Again, she thanked me but stressed that it was heavy. I reached over and picked it up; it wasn't that bad, bulky but not very heavy.

I carried the suitcase down three flights of stairs. The lady thanked me and asked me how to buy tickets for the train.  I motioned to a series of self-service machines but explained that I wasn't familiar with how they work. On the rare occasions when I took the PATH, I used the MetroCard that we used for the subways. I'm not sure that option is still available, as the MetroCard has been discontinued, but I digress.

The lady thanked me again, and I wished her a safe journey before heading to catch the subway. In retrospect, I feel bad that I didn't help her with the ticket machines.

Making Better Movies on Smaller Budgets

If a movie makes $4 million at the box office, is it a failure?

I the producers spend $20M making it, it's a flop. If they spent $50M, it's a disaster.

But what if the film was made on a budget of $450,000? If you invest $450k on something and get a return of $4M in a year, you'd be pretty happy.

One of my favorite films, Brick (2005), was made for $450k. It was Rian Johnson's first feature film. His cousin composed the soundtrack.

Johnson went on to make big budget films, such as Knives Out and Star Wars: The Last Jedi, but of all of his work, Brick is still my favorite.

I'd like to see more films made on tight budgets. I like to see talented writers, directors, and actors working on projects because they believe more in a script than a paycheck. Even if it's a group of friends shooting in available light on consumer cameras, if the story is good, I'd want to see it.

The entertainment industry craves blockbusters. They want projects that will result in massive paychecks. And so, they make their $50-100M movies, and occasionally those movies give them a huge return on investment. And oftentimes, they flop.

The expectation of a massive payday makes it harder to fund and distribute independent films. That's a problem, because a massive payday requires filling lots of seats. Filling lots of seats requires sticking with ideas that have worked in the past instead of taking a chance on something that no one has ever seen before.

Low budget films are creative and bold.

Big budget films are derivative and formulaic.

Support independent filmmakers, and by all means, if you have an idea for a movie, make it and put it out there. Gather your resources, figure out how to work efficiently, and tell your story. Fresh voices and perspectives are more interesting than bloated Hollywood retreads.

Lies and Irony

It’s ironic that Trump’s Department of Justice has indicted former FBI Director James Comey on the charge of lying to Congress. One could argue that members of Trump’s own cabinet lied during their Senate confirmation hearings.

Attorney General Pam Bondi testified that “no one will be prosecuted, investigated because they are a political opponent.” The indictment of Director Comey can’t be viewed in any context other than political retribution.

Current FBI Director Kash Patel testified that “there is no enemies list” despite having published a book that recommended prosecution of a list of Donald Trump’s political enemies. Patel also testified that no FBI agents would be fired or disciplined for investigating the January 6th riot at the Capitol. This has happened to numerous agents; some are suing for wrongful termination.

Health and Human Services Secretary Robert F. Kennedy, Jr. promised Senator Bill Cassidy of Louisiana that he would keep the CDC’s Vaccine Advisory Board in place. Once confirmed, Kennedy, a noted vaccine skeptic, fired every member of the board and replaced them with unqualified cronies.

The three justices that Trump nominated to the Supreme all testified that Roe v. Wade was “established precedent.” Each of them deliberately ignored that precedent when they had a chance to overturn it (Dobbs vs. Jackson Women’s Health Organization). Whether this rises to the level of “lying to Congress” is debatable, but it clearly was a tactic to make them appear to respect legal precedents by creatively evading the truth about their actual intentions.

The final irony is that Director Comey arguably helped Trump get elected in the first place by announcing publicly just weeks before the 2016 election that the FBI had reopened its investigation of Hillary Clinton, the Democratic nominee for President. It’s not certain that this action was enough to tip the scales in Trump’s favor, but it definitely did damage to Clinton’s campaign and reputation.

Trump should have bought Jim Comey a beer. Instead, he fired him, and now he’s having him prosecuted. Loyalty, for Donald Trump, is always a one-way street.

Photography and Other Questions

Frequently Asked Questions

Where are you from?

Western Pennsylvania. Our sandwiches are subs, not hoagies.

How tall are you?

Not as tall as I used to be.

Why do you take pictures?

The same reason everyone else takes pictures. It’s fun, and it helps us remember things.

What advice would you give to new photographers?

1. Find that gets you excited and photograph that. Passion drives creativity.

2. Hang out with people who know more than you do and prepare to look foolish. If you’re not feeling humiliated from time to time, you’re not growing.

3. Try different things and different styles. Everything you learn will help you.

How would you describe yourself?

I wouldn’t. I already know myself.

Why do you write music?

I love music and I like to create beautiful things, and because I figured out how to do it.

What’s 2 + 2?

An arithmetic expression with a binary operator.

What is the definition of a woman?

If I knew, I might have done better with them.

Do you have any advice for creatives?

Yeah, two things. First, keep it simple. Complexity will slow you down. No one has time to waste.

The second thing is to be fearless. Absolutely fearless. The whole world might think it’s a dumb idea, but you don’t answer to them. You answer to yourself. You’re the only person who’s going to be disappointed if you don’t accomplish your goals. Don’t hold back.

So, creativity is about confidence?

It’s about ignoring anyone who doesn’t appreciate your ideas.

Are you always this snarky?

Only on Tuesdays and Thursdays.

Any other advice?

Stay humble and always be learning. The moment you think you have it all figured out, the world will run past you.

Dream 2025-09-03

Dream 2025-09-03

She was an exotic beauty in her late thirties with olive-skin, a nice body, and an air of sophistication. Her shoulder-length raven hair was dominated by a loose wave. We didn’t speak much during out time together.

Afterward, I was compelled to explain our interaction, first to her father, a short, well-dressed gentleman with an ascot, who might have been from Italy or Greece or Lebanon. Thankfully, he was good-natured. Our conversation was brief and respectful.

Next came the guy, the one who thinks she loves him even though she doesn’t give a damn, a frat boy with blond hair and a trust-fund attitude. He was aggressive verbally and physically.

“She doesn’t even like you,” I scoffed in an indignant tone as I dodged a chair that he threw at me.

Eventually, the frat brat gave up and stomped off.

I was asked to speak with a blonde woman named Kathy, someone I worked with years ago. She was upset, but not by me or my fling with the exotic brunette. Something else was bothering her. Her friends asked if I could help calm her down.

I agreed, but they said she went to her office. It wasn’t a work day, but her company was hosting an event for the employees.

I was relieved. I made amends where I could and did what I could do. The dream came to an uneventful end.

Light A Candle

The United States of America is failing to protect its children. Politicians love to go on TV and talk about all sort of threats to children, real and imagined, but when it comes to addressing the REAL danger, they hide in their office for fear of upsetting a powerful lobby that represents a small part of the population.

I am not anti-firearm. Countries that ban firearms are not always safer than the USA. Japan is safer. Mexico is not.

But something has to be done. Some changes must be made, because the system we have now is GETTING KIDS KILLED.

It’s time to stop pretending. It’s time to stop blaming mental health. There are mentally ill people all over the world. Only the US has rampant mass shootings in schools.

It’s time to stop pretending that we are safer when anyone can buy as many guns as they want. I understand that some people are really attached to their guns and that the vast majority of gun owners don’t commit violent crimes.

But we have to face the fact that within our society live a significant number of people who dream of committing mass murder. That is an inescapable fact. And as long as we cannot determine in advance who those people are, although there are often clues, we need to come up with a system that slows them down when they attempt to arm themselves in preparation for a mass casualty event.

I don’t claim to have the answers, but I know, and you know, that if nothing is done, more children will die.

Adventures In Recycling

Early in my career, I worked on a large project with consultants from a well-known firm, a company whose name started with A. After the Enron scandal, Company A rebranded to a different name which also starts with A.

Company A was leading the project, so we worked side by side with their people. I sat in a room with three of the A consultants, collegial young fellows who enjoyed talking about sports and sharing movie quotes. We got along pretty well; they invited me out for drinks a few times.

Another consultant from Company A was young lady named Holly. Holly’s desk was elsewhere on the floor, but she stopped by our room frequently. One of the guys was her boyfriend.

In our room, not far from my desk, was a recycling bin for papers. One day, Holly threw trash from her lunch into the bin. I mentioned to her calmly and politely that the bin was for papers. Trash should be tossed elsewhere.

There was a tense silence in the room. Holly didn’t acknowledge my comment. No, “Oh, I didn’t realize that.” Just silence.

Boyfriend didn’t take this well. For the next hour, he raided file cabinets all through the building, bringing back ream after ream of paper which he threw violently into the recycling bin. He’d disappear for a few minutes and return with more paper. Slam! Right into the bin!

When the bin was stacked to the top with what must have been fifty or sixty pounds of paper, Boyfriend brought two coffee pots from the cafeteria and dumped the coffee into the recycle bin. It was a huge mess. None of the paper could be recycled.

I can only guess at Boyfriend’s intentions. Perhaps he thought that he was teaching me a lesson for daring to criticize his squeeze. It was the most unprofessional behavior I have ever seen.

Every time I see an ad for Company A, I still think of that guy. “Hire us. We’ll run your project, quote ‘White Men Can’t Jump’ all day long, and if you criticize us, we’ll act like angry toddlers.”

Let's Solve A Puzzle!

Let’s solve a puzzle! Here are the clues.

1. The administration deported hundreds of migrants and asylum seekers to a country that is not their country of origin. This seemed random. Why would they do that, and why were these people given no due process before being shipped off to a foreign prison?

2. The president signed an executive order ending birthright citizenship. This seems frivolous, as it’s a right guaranteed in the US constitution, but the supreme court has already ruled against provisions in the same amendment. They could do it again. They used this case to ban federal judges from issuing nationwide injunctions. When a president issues an illegal order, it will be more difficult for the courts to block it.

3. After numerous legal battles, the supreme court ruled that the president does indeed have the authority to deport people to random countries.

4. The president publicly threatened to strip Americans of their citizenship and deport them. This raises the stakes considerably. Now, in addition to deporting non-citizens to random countries, they want to extend this practice to US citizens. If the high court rules that citizens can be stripped of their citizenship, this will not only be possible, but it can be expedited.

5. The bill recently passed by the congress massively increases funding for immigration agents and detention centers, a.k.a. concentration camps.

6. Project 2025 suggests that the US population should be limited to 100 million. Currently, there are 350 million US citizens. How are they planning to reduce the number to 100 million? 

The logical conclusion is that the administration, at the behest of Project 2025, plans to reduce the population of the US dramatically through all available means, including denaturalizing and deporting citizens.

Political Violence

When DJT came down the escalator to announce his political career ten years ago, I notice two things.

1. His wife was in front of him on the escalator

Every gentleman knows that the woman must be ABOVE the man on a staircase, so he can catch her if she stumbles. When a couple descends a staircase together, the man goes first. Trump flunked Man School.

2. The campaign was defined by demagoguery

DJT immediately launched into a series of unfounded smears about immigrants from Latin America, calling them criminals, rapists, and drug smugglers. Later he would claim that Latin American countries were emptying their prisons and mental institutions and sending “the worst of the worst” to our country.

Immigrants commit crimes at lower rates than US-born citizens, but Trump and his supporters in right-wing media have perpetuated the myth of the “dangerous immigrant” as a way of scaring their base into supporting his authoritarian policies.

The Irony is that there’s a real problem in Latin America that Trump failed to mention: political violence. Run for mayor in Mexico, and a drug cartel will probably try to kill you. It’s dangerous to be a politician in Latin America.

And yet, the lasting legacy of the Trump presidencies is political violence:

- The siege of the US Capitol on January 6

- Speaker Pelosi’s husband attacked in his own home

- Democratic politicians shot in Minnesota

- Two attempts made on DJT’s life

- Arson at Tesla dealerships

- The plot to kidnap the Governor of Michigan

- Arson at the PA Governor’s Mansion on Passover

- Cars ramming crowds in New Orleans, Charlottesville, et al.

- A mass shooting at the July 4 parade in Highland Park, Illinois

Harsh rhetoric, conspiracy theories, and demonization of the other have brought us to this point. How will we find our way back to sanity?

Random Thoughts - 20250507

Random Thoughts - 20250507

My name is Daniel. I’m 185 centimeters tall. I’m one of the people who graduated from my high school. My zodiac sign is among my twelve favorites, but I’m guessing that yours is, too.

I prefer the Jim Phelps version of Mission: Impossible to the Ethan Hunt version. Stunts don’t add to the story.

The Naked Gun is one of my favorite comedies despite the fact that no one gets naked, and despite one glaring casting issue.

I like to travel, but I’ve never been to Morocco. I have nothing against Morocco; a trip there just hasn’t risen to the top of my to do list.

“Walking In Memphis” is one of my favorite songs. I haven’t been to Memphis either. Occasionally, I imagine walking there and writing a song about it.

I didn’t care for broccoli or lima beans when I was a kid, but I’ll eat them now. I like most vegetables, but I’m not vegan. If you are, I’d prefer not to discuss it.

I watch lots of news, but I don’t spend time thinking about the price of eggs. I can’t remember the last time I bought one. It’s difficult to imagine needing twelve of them.

I once saw a UFO while driving on the Pennsylvania Turnpike. I was driving. The UFO was flying off to my right, heading in the same direction but faster. It was daylight, but no one seemed to notice. Noticing things is a lost art.

I’m fairly open-minded, but I believe that authoritarianism is universally awful. I doubt that anyone would be able to convince me otherwise.

Good people die too soon. Bad people have a long shelf life. I don’t know why that is, but it complicates history.

The Chinese zodiac is also based on the number 12. That strikes me as an unlikely coincidence.

Lies

The pat exaggerations

That shape the way we live

The blame and accusations

We’re oft prepared to give

Convenient excuses

We store on private shelves

The most corrosive lies

Are the ones we tell ourselves

The Era Of Political Corruption

What bothers me most is not that our government is about to be led by a convicted criminal, a corrupt and vengeful authoritarian who threatens to abuse power and prosecute political rivals. Dangerous scoundrels have been involved in politics since the dawn of mankind.

What bothers me most is not that a plurality of the electorate voted for this scoundrel. People are routinely convinced to vote against their own best interest. The propaganda that makes this possible is more prevalent today than ever before.

What bothers me most is that all of the controls that were meant to prevent corruption and the rise of authoritarianism have failed.

Impeachment is neutered by partisan loyalty.

The rights afforded to protect criminal defendants have been exploited to further criminal gains. 

The justice system was hog tied by an endless stream of appeals and delays.

The Fourteenth Amendment and the Emoluments Clause have been deemed unenforcible.

The judicial branch, corrupted by deep pocketed interests and a lack of ethical accountability, made a series of absurd and unprecedented judgments for the sole purpose to render one criminal defendant in particular above the law. It’s as though they wrote an extra article of the constitution to protect him and he alone.

The rule of law has been reduced to a quaint slogan.

This is what bothers me most, because it’s difficult to imagine how we can undo the damage. The precedents that have been set in recent years are highly toxic to a healthy and thriving democracy. It’s going to require a groundswell of political will and a complete recalibration of the principles of political ethics and criminal justice.

In the meantime, brace for an onslaught of damage to rights and political norms as self-serving oligarchs and right-wing zealots take control of the reins of power.

Snowflakes

The 2025 presidential inauguration will usher in a new era of masculinity in U.S. politics, an era of bold, manly men who run inside and hide when the weather gets cold. Some might call them snowflakes.