South Of Someplace: April 2014

Wednesday, April 30, 2014

Bob Hoskins

I was sad to hear of the passing of Bob Hoskins. I identified with his down and out character Eddie Valiant in the Robert Zemeckis film, 'Who Framed Roger Rabbit?'

A Schoolyard Analogy

Life is like a schoolyard. The powerful take what they want and rationalize their actions with any logic that sounds pleasing to their greedy little ears.

A man got onto my subway car this morning screaming angry rants. It was mostly gibberish. He used the N-word a whole bunch of times, taunted riders ("What you gonna do? Act tough?), bragged about killing KKK members in the past, and imitated the sound of gunfire several times ("Pop! Pop! Pop!").

I wonder what set him off.

Sunday, April 27, 2014

Dating a German Woman by the Numbers

Eins sharing my advice on how to date a German woman.

Get her to zwei some wine. Sweet or drei, it doesn't matter.

The wine will calm her vier so she can have some fünf.

She'll be more open to the idea of having sechs.

Once you get her into bed, make her feel as though she's in sieben.

"Acht!" she'll cry out. "I want you to be neun!"

After a few in-zehn dates like this, you may find yourself falling for this cute little elf.

But to prevent a zwölf from trying to steal her away, always leave her zwanzig more sechs.

Copyright © 2014 Daniel R. South
All Rights Reserved

Time For Tantra

Tantric sex - It sounds like fun, but who has that kind of time?

I can't do
What I have to do
If I spend all my time
Doing you

Copyright © 2014 Daniel R. South
All Rights Reserved

Saturday, April 26, 2014

The Pen Is Mightier Than The Sword

The pen is mightier than the sword - until someone comes after you with a sword for something that you wrote with your pen.

Copyright © 2014 Daniel R. South
All Rights Reserved

Tuesday, April 22, 2014

Texting Issue

When it comes to texting, I'm all thumbs.

Aircraft Not Found - So Sue Boeing?

It was inevitable. The MH370 plane disaster has spawned a lawsuit - against Boeing.

It never takes the greedy lawyers long to convert a tragedy into a chance to line their pockets.

What's Boeing supposed to do? Build a deep sea submarine and scour the Indian Ocean until it finds the plane. This is an utterly pointless (except for greed) and sinister attack on a productive company that probably had nothing to do with the incident.

Monday, April 21, 2014

They're Not Paying You For Your Looks

Remember, they're not paying you for your looks - or they'd have to pay you more! :-)

Sunday, April 20, 2014

The Run Is My Angel

The run is my angel
My mistress
My friend
My intimate confidante
My mentor
My trainer
My tireless companion
My muse
My lover
My physician
My partner in crime.

When I turn my back on her
And spend all of my time on other pursuits

Even profitable and important tasks

Before long

I feel sickly and weak
A shadow of the person

Who walks in my shoes
When I am at my best.

But
When I spend more time with her
Sweating and breathing

Slicing through the wind

As she matches my pace, stride for stride,
I feel strong

I feel alive

I worry less and
Think more clearly
Love more expressively
And savor all of the blessings of life
With a calm soul
And abundant vitality.

Copyright © 2014 Daniel R. South
All Rights Reserved

Hurricane Justice

I am saddened today to read of the passing of Rubin 'Hurricane' Carter, known for his skills as a boxer and for serving nineteen years in prison for a crime that he didn't commit.

In honor of the Hurricane, let us resolve work toward meaning reform in our criminal justice system, reform that will prevent the destruction of innocent lives by the mandate to imprison someone - anyone - to create the illusion that justice has been served.

Copyright © 2014 Daniel R. South
All Rights Reserved

Saturday, April 19, 2014

Planning Versus Reacting

I think of myself as a contemplative person. I prefer to plan my activities and structure my time. I try to avoid interruptions in order to focus on objectives.

But I have found that I also enjoy reacting to circumstances in the moment, and that this actually might be where I am at my best.

I enjoy the insights and the humor that are revealed when a conversation turns toward unexpected territory.

If I pass by something that strikes me as visually interesting, I think about how I might photograph it effectively.

When I hear a musical instrument with a pleasing tone, I think about the music that I could write for that instrument.

When someone asks me a question, I begin to think about the larger issue and how I could write a blog post to address it.

When I walk into my classroom and see a gender imbalance or another potential challenge, I think of ways to ensure that everyone has a good time and comes away with worthwhile information.

I think of myself as more of a planner than a reactor, but I'm glad that I have the ability to switch gears and make the most of the moment when it counts. Because life rarely goes according to plan.

This Post Intentionally Left Blank

Note to publishers of training manuals:

A page containing the text "THIS PAGE INTENTIONALLY LEFT BLANK" is NOT a blank page.

Perhaps it should read: "THIS PAGE INTENTIONALLY IMPRINTED WITH A POINTLESS MESSAGE."

How to Converse with Women in the Office - Tips for Guys

The Informational Approach

"Hi, Jane! Did you see the article on gene therapy in the New York Times? They think that they might have a cure for leukemia within ten years."

Result: FAILURE

Jane will have a puzzled look on her face. "Uh, I'm really busy right now," she'll say as she directs her attention back to her computer monitor. If you continue discussing your original topic, she'll grab her purse and retreat to the ladies room where she'll spend time wondering when you turned into a babbling weirdo.

The Complimentary Approach

"Hi, Alice! Are those new shoes? They look amazing!"

Result: UNPREDICTABLE

Alice might show genuine appreciation for the compliment and will try to verify and clarify your comment. "Do you like them?" she may ask. If you convince her that your admiration is genuine (but not uncomfortable), she might spend some time chatting with you.

On the other hand, if Alice is suspicious of your intentions, or if she is uncomfortable receiving compliments, she'll wonder why you're checking out her shoes.

The Basic Desires Approach

"Hi, Amanda! We should have lunch at that new place on Third Avenue. Mary Ann says that the chocolate fondue is better than the weekend of steamy revenge sex that she had with her college boyfriend just before he got married."

Result: POSITIVE

"Oh my goodness!" Amanda exclaims. "I LOVE chocolate fondue! We should go next week!"

Yeah, well, I haven't figured it out, either. But that's how it seems to work.

Copyright © 2014 Daniel R. South
All Rights Reserved

Friday, April 18, 2014

Run More

I need to run more. A LOT more.

Copyright © 2014 Daniel R. South
All Rights Reserved

Wednesday, April 16, 2014

Forgiveness

Some people endure unspeakable cruelty and still find a way to forgive their persecutors. At the other end of the spectrum, we have all watched people react bitterly to the utterance of a single unkind word.

Maybe forgiveness is a talent, like singing, which comes easily to some folks while others struggle to carry the simplest tune.

But as with most qualities that are worth having, forgiveness is probably a skill, a skill that most of us could improve and even master with discipline, dedication, and commitment - even those who find the very thought of forgiveness to be daunting.

Copyright © 2014 Daniel R. South
All Rights Reserved

Tuesday, April 15, 2014

Learning By Making Mistakes

Meeting St. Peter

Friday, April 4, 2014

The Vanderbilt Fortune

According to recent news reports, Gloria Vanderbilt won't be leaving the family fortune to Anderson Cooper, her only living offspring.

I understand that money can be a corrupting influence. But Cooper is a principled and productive individual who has demonstrated great motivation throughout his professional career. Inheriting a fortune isn't going to turn him into a slacker. He has already made quite a bit of money on his own.

Why not permit Anderson to take over as the steward for the Vanderbilt fortune? He seems like a thoughtful, reasonable individual. He could administer scholarships and other philanthropic causes after his mother is gone. I don't see the logic in cutting him off.

The Feeling That I Get

Wednesday, April 2, 2014

Putin Gets Divorced

Putin gets divorced. Wife demands half of Crimea.

Debate the Position, Not the Person

Debate a position, not a person. It is critical when debating a topic to avoid impugning the credibility of those who take an opposing stance.

Example 1: I don't care for rap, because it lacks a traditional melody.

Example 2: Anyone who listens to rap is an idiot.

The latter approach is known as an ad hominem attack and it is never helpful. By putting people on the defensive, we discourage logical thought and incite emotional reactions. Consensus becomes all but impossible under these conditions.

Ad hominem attacks are popular in politics and in politically driven media outlets, but popularity does not make it correct.

As with profanity, ad hominem attacks are intellectual shortcuts. They are reactive and devoid of reason.

Avoid reactive thinking and force yourself to reason and communicate with precision and clarity. Hold yourself to a higher standard.

Don't permit debates to become personal. Find fault with the position rather than the person.

South Of Someplace