Tuesday, June 30, 2020
Desk
Sometimes I look
At my desk full of stuff
And I think to myself
That I’ve come quite far
Yes
I’ve done quite a lot
Without stirring it up
And we can probably go
A bit longer
With things as they are
Best Advice
I used to know a guy with an annoying habit. He liked to ask my opinion on things, but every time I offered my best advice, he would dismiss it and counter with something that he’d read or seen on the Internet.
Could I recommend a camera? Sure! Oh, but the Internet says that this model is better.
Okay...
Could I recommend an interesting place to go on vacation? Sure! Oh, but the Internet says that this other place is better and more fun and less expensive.
Okay...
Eventually, I became so exasperated that I had to say something.
“You ask me for my advice, and not just once - you’ve done this a number of times. But every time I give you my opinion, you shake your head and tell me that you’d prefer to take some recommendation that you read on the Internet. Why do you bother even asking if you’re just going to dismiss my opinion?”
The guy looked at me as though I were speaking Swahili. He didn’t seem to be able to comprehend that it was a waste of my time to give him advice that he had no intention of even considering.
A couple of months later, he asked me for my recommendation on a photo printer.
“Here we go again!” my brain screamed, but I decided to be nice and give this one more shot. I listened as he described what he wanted to accomplish and suggested some models in his price range.
The guy smirked and shook his head. I was familiar with that smirk. I wanted to hit him with a rolling pin.
“CNET says that the Phinkelstien 5000 is the best photo printer for under a hundred seventy-five dollars.”
“That’s fine,” I said calmly. I wasn’t going to argue.
A few days later, he received his shiny new Phinkelstien 5000 Photo Printer, took it out of the box, and gave it a try. His disappointment was immediate and profound.
The next time I spoke to him, he expressed his extreme dissatisfaction with the quality of the prints. - In my mind, I can still hear him whining about it. - The guy was also an extreme tightwad, and he was more than a little upset about the money that he had spent on this turkey of a product.
“Well, I gave you my advice,” I said calmly, “and you didn’t take it.”
“I know,” he whined, “but CNET said that this was the best model.”
It’s unkind, I realize, but I still take some cold satisfaction in the way that it worked out.
Monday, June 29, 2020
Random Thoughts - 20200629
Random Thoughts - 20200629
I’m just a guy who likes to say, “I’m just a guy.”
I probably shouldn’t disclose this, but I shower in the nude.
I enjoy traveling, but I hate to pack. Maybe next time I’ll just leave the suitcase at home and wing the whole fresh clothes thing.
Frozen pizza tastes like it’s a day old the minute you heat it. They really nailed that leftover pizza taste!
They say that you shouldn’t shop for food when you’re hungry. Should you avoid looking for a mate when you’re horny? What actions you take before a date to calm yourself down? Enjoy a quick snack?
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