Tuesday, December 9, 2014

Using Physics to Pick Up Women

My friend Vektor uses his knowledge of physics to pick up women. I know, I know! It sounds unbelievable, but he explained how it works.

His opening topic is always light. If he doesn't get a reaction, he relies on fluid dynamics to overcome inertia and accelerate the discussion. If he detects any waves, he'll explain the gravity of his position. 

As things progress, he strings the woman along with charm, especially if she has a nice bottom. He has some quarks, but he's not strange. He likes to laugh and claims that, in principle, it relieves uncertainty. If he can get the lady to laugh, that increases the probability of them being unified.

This approach has been working well for Vektor. Recently, he's hosted a number of intensive all night sessions on thermodynamics and oscillatory motion. I think he's been with Zeta and Rho, but he doesn't disclose his partners. Quantum mechanics taught him the relative importance of being discrete.





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