Deep Hatred

I have discussed this topic before, but now there is a new context. I’ll make two points at the conclusion of my remarks.

I have a friend; let’s call him Zeke. I’ve known Zeke for a long time in real life. We were connected on Facebook for a while, but not any longer. 

Zeke had a habit that I found objectionable. He used to post crude, nasty, and extremely personal memes about Nancy Pelosi, the Speaker of the House of Representatives, one of the most powerful people in US politics. A mild example would start with an unflattering still photo taken while Speaker was talking. The facial features would look distorted because of fleeting the movements that we make when we talk. To that, they added some insulting text such as, “can you believe that someone has to sleep with this person?” Their language was more vulgar, but you get the idea.

Zeke used to post stuff like this all the time. He really seemed to enjoy sharing it. He had friends who would chime in with approval.

To be fair, I have leveled a lot of criticism toward Mr. Trump over the years. I have criticized his rhetoric, his policies, his actions, his apparent ineptitude for the job that he was given, and I have suggested that he should be held accountable for what I believe to be some serious offenses.

That said, I never made personal attacks in the style of Zeke’s posts about Mrs. Pelosi. I have never had an interest in attacking the man personally, only his job performance. Further, when I see people posting unkind things about the First Lady, often using photos from her former career as a model, I call out that behavior. There’s no reason to criticize the family members of politicians unless they become involved in the politics themselves.

I noticed something interesting. When I criticized the president for his divisive rhetoric or one of his questionable policy decisions, Zeke would often accuse me of being “filled with hate.”

I didn’t feel that this was fair. Zeke’s criticism of Mrs. Pelosi was personal and ugly. It that had nothing to do with her job performance. I, on the other hand, made no such comments about the president; I simply remarked on actions that he took during the course of his work.

“Why are you so filled with hate?” Zeke would ask. He sent that phrase so many times that I suspect that he had it programmed into his keyboard.

Comment 1 - When Zeke accused me of “hating” a political rival, it was not in response to what I actually said. He was reflecting his own emotional state. This is how HE felt toward his own political rivals.

Zeke legitimately hates Mrs. Pelosi. He has a deep, overwhelming animosity toward he, and I can’t explain why. I suspect that he doesn’t even understand it. It’s not for any policy position that he’s ever mentioned. He just despises her as a person as though she were some reprehensible villain in a story.

Maybe he heard other people making nasty remarks about her and eventually got into the habit of parroting their comments. Maybe it’s the result of classical conditioning from the radio and television programming that he consumes. Maybe he and his friends enjoy laughing over beers while sharing such rude comments about the lady. It’s a deep hatred, but it doesn’t seem to be based in anything factual.

Comment 2 - This week, during the violent insurrection at the US Capitol, several of the rioters told the press that they had come with the intention of doing serious physical harm to the Speaker. I’ll bet that they didn’t really understand why, either. Nevertheless, they were conditioned to hate her so deeply as to want to do her grievous harm.

As a nation, we need to understand address the factors that lead to such virulent extremism. Our survival as a democracy depends on it.