South Of Someplace: January 2019

Wednesday, January 30, 2019

Work In Progress

Try and try again

Life is a work in progress

When we fail, we learn

Expect Miracles

Expect miracles

They won’t happen ev’ry day

Just when you need them

Polar Vortex

The Polar Vortex

Temps will drop and winds will blow

It’s too cold to snow!

Monday, January 28, 2019

Resolution Update 2019

One of my New Year’s resolutions was to take it easy and not push myself so hard. I’d tell you how it’s going, but that would require effort.

Lit

Sometimes when they’re lit

People say the strangest shit

There’s no stopping it

Space On The Bus

Wide seat on the bus

Plenty big for both of us

Move over, Rover!

Political Science 101

1. If you plan to run for political office, don’t hire a bunch of criminals.

2. If you have to hire criminals, hire good, experienced crooks who know how not to get caught.

3. If you have to hire a bunch of stupid crooks, reconsider you desire to run for office.

Saturday, January 26, 2019

Mr. Obama asked congress repeatedly to come up with an immigration reform bill. Did they do it? No. They refused. Congress was run by Republicans for six of Obama’s eight years in office. They had every opportunity to present legislation for him to sign, but they were too weak and lazy to take on a serious issue and too concerned about never giving Obama a legislative victory to care. And now, suddenly, after all of these years, Republicans think that illegal immigration is an emergency. Hmm!

Thursday, January 24, 2019

New York Minute 130 - Dog License

I was on my way to work one morning last week when I passed a young woman walking her dog. The sidewalk was narrow at the point where we met. The curb was lined with trees and garbage bags, and the brownstones had long front staircases that reached out toward the street.

The lady and her dog were a few paces away, when the dog made a sudden stop and began to urinate on one of the staircases. His urine streaked across the sidewalk like a foamy, yellow river as it made its way toward the lower level of the street.

The lady smiled nervously and apologized. “It’s okay,” I said, as I stepped cautiously across El Rio Amarillo.

This incident makes me wonder why dogs have free license to urinate and defacate on every square inch of the public areas of the city. Yes, owners are required to pick up the bulk of the poo poo, but there’s always some residue left behind, often a substantial amount.

If a human being left a smeared streak of stinky, steaming turd on the sidewalk, there would be widespread outrage. It would probably make the evening news; the neighborhood would be the butt of jokes, no pun intended. Tourists would avoid the area. Residents would go out of their way to avoid the street where the offense took place. Schoolboys would make jokes about the incident.

Yet, we go outside and walk on dog dirt every single day. I try to watch my step, but I frequently see people plow right through gobs of the stuff, blissfullly unaware of the bacteria that they are now spreading mindlessly.

Please temember to take your shoes off when you get home. You wouldn’t to track Eau de Fido and Residue of Rover into the kitchen.

Fruit Juice

Oh delicious fruit

How I love to sip your juice

Sweet and refreshing

Tuesday, January 22, 2019

I Feel Like The Planet

I feel like the planet. I’m not in great shape, and I understand the importance of taking better care of myself, but I’m finding it hard to make changes, and I wonder if it might be too late.

Be Careful Not To Fall For It

Be careful not to fall for your own bullshit. And when you do, and you will from time to time, have the guts to admit it and the presence of mind to jump back into reality. Being full of yourself is never a valuable asset.

Sunday, January 20, 2019

Life Wants You

Breathe with confidence

Celebrate the things you’ve done

And how far you’ve come

Think of all you’ve learned

All the work that you’ve put in

To take you this far

Take credit for that

Recognize your sacrifice

Be proud of your life

But know that there’s more

More to learn, more work to do,

More to challenge you

If you want to grow

Recognize how much there is

That you still don’t know

See things as they are

Avoid the temptation to

Think you’ve done your best

And please never fall

For the pleasant delusion

That it’s time to rest

Life wants more from you

More dreams, more work, more struggle,

You have more to give

Happiness is not

A goal once reached remembered

Living in the past

Happiness is life

Spent learning and striving for

New goals ev’ry day

Know that this is true

You’re alive ‘cause life wants you

Now, what will you do?

Friday, January 18, 2019

New York Minute 129 - Storm Damage

As snowflakes fell gently throughout the city this morning, I heard a man remark sarcastically to a passerby, “this global warming is going to kill us.” At the time, I was walking through a part of the city that had been battered by Superstorm Sandy in 2012, a massive weather system that caused $19 billion in damage in New York City, alone, and $65 billion in total. It occurred to me that human beings are only as intelligent as they choose to be.

Thursday, January 17, 2019

New York Minute 128 - Double Bogey

It is an uncomfortable feeling when a panhandler walks onto your subway car and launches into a pathetic but disingenuous pitch for money. You’re trapped in an enclosed space with a nuissance, a person who is determined to elicit an uncomfortable emotional response, if that’s what it takes to get you to hand over some cold, hard cash. You suspect that they are up to no good, that the money that will be used to feed their addictions, satisfy their greed, or fund coordinated criminal activity.

But you’re stuck. The only way to escape this attempt at emotional blackmail is to pass to the next subway car, which, while the train is moving, is both dangerous and illegal. Then again, panhandling is illegal, and the authorities do little to discourage it.

Imagine a situation where two panhandlers enter your subway car at the same time, one from each end. Imagine them presenting their well-rehearsed pitches simultaneously. I had the opportunity to experience such an event earlier this week. It was as dreadful as it sounds.

Wednesday, January 16, 2019

New York Minute 127 - Shutdown Passport Blues

I’m not sure whether the US Postal Service has been impacted by the government shutdown, but the mood was tense when I stopped by my local post office this past Saturday. One of the postal workers was exchanging harsh words with a customer waiting in the passport line. On the other side of the lobby, a tense group of people waited for passport photos. Some of them were arguing with the lady holding the camera about who was next. These are crazy times.

Tuesday, January 15, 2019

New York Minute 126 - Eventful Commute

As I stepped out of my apartment building this morning, I heard the unmistakeable crunch of a fender bender. I looked and saw a black Chevy Suburban stopped in the intersection. A large, tractor trailer dump truck was stopped behind the Chevy. Beside the Suburban, a school bus was picking up students.

The Suburban had stopped, rightfully, because the bus was flashing his lights and had its side STOP sign extended. Apparently, the trucker couldn’t stop in time. This could have resulted in a serious accident, but there was very little damage to the Chevy and none to the truck. They must have tapped very lightly.

The drivers, two guys in their forties or fifties, got out of their respective vehicles and started yelling at each other. The truck driver was wearing a Bluetooth headset, which led me to believe that he had been on the phone when the incident occurred.

I realized at this point that I had forgotten something, so I went back inside for a few minutes. When I came back out, the truck, the Chevy, and the school bus were all gone. I guess the drivers must have agreed that the light damage did not warrant involving the authorities. Perhaps some cash changed hands.

I walked briskly to the subway station, as I was now running a little behind schedule. When I got downstairs, I checked the sign and saw that they next train would be arriving in six minutes. A pretty young woman with long blond hair dashed past me, swiped her card through the turnstile, and raced down another flight of stairs to the track level. I guess she failed to notice the sign indicating that she had six minutes to spare.

The train was fairly full but not overly crowded, as rush hour had not yet reached its peak. Unfortunately, an indigent person was sleeping on one of the seats of the car that I boarded. His wheelchair was parked in the doorway, and he did not smell very good. It wasn’t the horrific, vomit inducing odor that one sometimes encounters in these situations, but it was bad enough to convince me to switch cars at the next station. Luckily, the train ran swiftly, and I arrived at the office without further incident or delay.

Monday, January 14, 2019

Brexit And Other Bad Ideas

Brexit, the really bad idea that might not happen.

Trump, the really bad idea that did happen.

Sunday, January 13, 2019

Reproductive Totalitarianism

Anti-abortion voters and activists can live up to their values by doing everything in their power to care for unwanted children or children whose parents cannot care for them. They can lend their support to programs that provide food and healthcare to those in need. They can contribute to scholarships that cover educational costs for youngsters and teens. They can volunteer for programs that keep kids active and out of trouble. Any of these contributions will make a difference in the lives of children.

Anti-abortion advocates should also consider adopting unwanted children. Adopt four kids, and you stop four abortions. Get a dozen others to do the same, and that’s fifty-two abortions prevented, a big win.

But let’s be realistic. How many people do you think will take on the challenge of adopting unwanted children? Very few, I would guess.

Most anti-abortion activists don’t want to raise other people’s children. They don’t to take on the responsibility. They don’t want to change diapers and wipe noses. They don’t want to bandage scraped knees or rush feverish kids to the hospital. They don’t want to deal with moody teens or pay for college. The prefer an easy, tidy solution where politicians coerce law enforcement to punish doctors and shift the full burden onto your women regardless of their circumstances.

The “pro-life” movement is not about life. It’s about control. Anti-abortion activists show little interest in raising unwanted children, feeding them, clothing them, paying their medical bills, educating them, supporting their development, keeping them safe from violence, or caring for their needs.

A legal ban on abortion is reproductive totalitarianism. It has no place in a free society. Women should be able to control their destinies without government oversight or the meddling of well-meaning neighbors who are not willing to lift a finger to help them raise a child.

Saturday, January 12, 2019

The Manchurian Candidate

Putin’s Wish List:

1. Lift the sanctions for invading Crimea

2. Weaken NATO

3. Less military resistance to North Korea

4. Get US troops out of Syria

5. Chaos in the US government

Comrad Trump made all of Vlad’s wishes come true!

Friday, January 11, 2019

Rough Road

I dreamt that I was driving swiftly along a wide, smooth stretch of highway. Suddenly, the surface became rough and treacherous. I found myself navigating around potholes and patches of loose gravel between slabs of freshly laid concrete. Pieces of large metal signs lay along the side of the road waiting to be hoisted and set into place.

For a moment, I feared that I had missed a turn and wandered into an active construction zone. I wondered whether it might be best to turn around and make my way back to the highway. But then, I realized that I was on the right road after all. It just wasn’t finished, and I would have to find my way through it.

Thursday, January 10, 2019

Productivity

Productivity doesn’t come from working frantically or being “on” all the time. We are most productive when we work in a focused, methodical, purposeful, and organized way, and when we get enough rest to come back and work effectively tomorrow, the next day, and every day thereafter.

Wednesday, January 9, 2019

Get It Done

Want to get it done?

Block time on your calendar

Or it won’t happen

Tuesday, January 8, 2019

Term Limits

Republicans in Congress recently proposed a bill that would establish term limits. I support this policy wholeheartedly. Term limits for Republicans sounds like a wonderful idea! The ones who have been there the longest can show their support by resigning immediately.

Monday, January 7, 2019

Toughen Up!

Life is Basic Training for the battles that you will be forced to fight in old age. Toughen up! It won’t be easy.

Sunday, January 6, 2019

Change Is Slow

“Let the anger go.”

That I did, though change was slow.

The pain takes longer.

Saturday, January 5, 2019

American Corporate Diet

Sugar-frosted flakes

Corp’rate food and marketing

Obesity makes

Friday, January 4, 2019

Instead Of Building Walls

Instead of erecting ineffective walls, let’s stabilize and rebuild failing countries. Let’s work toward a world where people no longer have to flee their homeland in order to lead safe and prosperous lives.

Thursday, January 3, 2019

Deadlines

Set deadlines

For what you control

Schedule a time

To reach your key goals

Leave everything else

In your life undefined

Good things will come to you

In their own time

Wednesday, January 2, 2019

New York Minute 125 - Half-Empty Subway Car

As the subway rolled into the station where I was waiting to board this morning, the cars were full of passengers, predictable, given that this is the first business day of the new year.

But one car was half-empty, and the passengers were all clustered at one end. At the other end of the car, a man was sleeping on one of the bench seats.

It’s not unusual for people to sleep on the trains. I see that every day. But when everyone else on the car makes an effort to avoid their space, it typically means that they are giving off a foul odor.

As I suspected, when the train stopped and the doors opened, a number of passengers with nauseated looks on their faces, rushed onto the platform and dashed over to the next car. Good morning, New York City!

Tuesday, January 1, 2019

The Most Important Thing

As we ring in the new year and reflect on where we have been and what we would like to do next, I am reminded of a story that I once read. A prominent industrialist hired a consultant to help streamline his business operations. The consultant spent a couple of weeks observing the work that was being done, asked questions, and took notes. He then presented his suggested solution to the industrialist.

“Have your people make a list of everything that they have to do. Ask them to order the list from the most important item to the least. Ask them to work on the most important item until they finish it. Then, they can move on to the second item on the list. This way, they will always be working on the most important task.”

The industrialist thanked the consultant, paid him a lot of money, and asked his executives to implement the new plan.

The executives didn’t like the idea very much. It seemed too simple. They felt that it wasn’t workable and that it wasn’t worth the money that the high-priced consultant had charged. The industrialist argued that he liked the idea of having his people work on what is most important, and that revolutionary ideas are often fundamentally simple. He insisted that the executives implement the plan without delay.

It’s a good story, but there’s one thing that always bothered me about the consultant’s recommendation. It lacks a key component. It provides no framework for deciding what the most important thing is at any given time.

If you ask yourself, “What’s the most important thing that I can accomplish this year?”, you might struggle to come up with an answer. It’s difficult to decide on a single most important objective, because we have competing demands in our lives. We have jobs. We have bills to pay and houses to maintain. We might be parents. We might be involved in a relationship. We might do community service or volunteer work. Each of those areas has its own priorities.

The late Dr. Stephen Covey addressed this issue with a brilliant approach. Dr. Covey suggested that before we can decide what the important tasks are on our agenda, we need to identify the different roles that we play in life. The roles will be different for each person, but they might look something like this.

Role 1. Parent

Role 2. Spouse or Partner

Role 3. Job/Student

Role 4. Volunteer at ...

Role 5. Friend

Role 6. Captain of the Bowling Team

Dr. Covey recommended a list of up to about seven roles to keep the scope manageable. He also suggested adding an extra role that he labeled “Sharpen The Saw”. This last role covers things that are important to our well-being such as exercise, medical checkups, and relaxation.

Once we have a list of the roles that we fulfill, we can think about think about what’s most important in each area of our lives. What are the two or three most important things that we might want to accomplish as parents? What are the two or three most important things we want to do for our spouse? What are the two or three most important things that we need to handle at work?

I would encourage you to try this exercise. It should only take a few minutes to list the roles, and you can think about what’s important for each role at your convenience.

I would also strongly encourage you to read Dr. Covey’s book, ‘The 7 Habits Of Highly Effective People’. What I described above is discussed in one section of the book (Habit 2: Put First Things First). The book goes into much greater detail includes a surprisingly insightful discussion on the difference between what is “important” and “urgent” in our lives. I’ll leave that as a teaser to inspire you to check out the book. :-)

Best wishes on your New Year’s planning and brainstorming, and I hope that you will accomplish all that is important to you in the coming year.