South Of Someplace: March 2016

Wednesday, March 30, 2016

The Best Debates

The best debates are the ones that we have with ourselves.

Bill and Janice

Janice Dickinson is suing Bill Cosby. I want to know when she's going to sue her plastic surgeon.

We Are Not Extremists

I don't judge Muslims by the actions of ISIS, Hezbollah, or al Qaeda. I don't just Christians by the actions of the Klan, the IRA, or people who bomb women's health clinics.

Barbarians are barbarians. The rest of us are just trying to live decent lives.

Sunday, March 27, 2016

A Canadian Perspective On Weather

Someone actually said this to me yesterday in Montreal when the temperature was at 1 degree Celcius (34 F).

"The weather's BEAUTIFUL today, yeah? This whole week it's supposed to be above zero!"

Saturday, March 26, 2016

The Taxiway

The Embraer 145 is one of the smallest aircraft that I have ever boarded. It would be an understatement to say that I couldn't stand up straight in its cabin. Doing so was torturous.

When our tiny craft queued on the taxiway behind a massive Boeing 777, the size of the much larger plane made an impression. It was like flying toward the Starship Enterprise in a Shuttlecraft.

I predicted to my travel companion that we would wait on the runway for several minutes in order to give the "heavy" a head start. Large aircraft create considerable turbulence in their wake; it's not advisable to follow them closely.

As predicted, we waited for about four minutes before ascending into thick, rain-filled clouds. Visibility was zero in the first few minutes of the flight. I was hoping that the heavy had put many miles between us.

Tuesday, March 22, 2016

Sweet Caffeine

You alone are my mistress today

Irresistible, sensual angel

Wrap me in your soft, smooth arms

Let me lean back deeply

Into the warmth of your nurturing breast

Take me

Kiss me

Elevate me

From mundanity

In our private moments together

I need you now

I need your warmth

So badly

I give myself to you

With abandon

Friday, March 18, 2016

Current Temperature

New York: 57F

Montréal: 34F

So much for socialized health care!

;-)

Wednesday, March 16, 2016

Supreme Court Confirmation Hearings

If the Senate Republicans refuse to hold confirmation hearings for President Obama's nominé, 63-year-old Merrick Garland, I won't complain.

When President Clinton comes into office in January, she can fill that looming vacancy with a 34-year-old Native American pro-choice anti-NRA conservationist lesbian feminist whose life partner is a Muslim civil rights attorney from Hollywood and openly breast feeds the couple's baby in public.

Because procrastination comes with a price - especially when it defies the Constitution.

Dreaming In Chaos

I just had a horrible dream. I found myself in a big room surrounded by second graders, except that in the dream, the kids were in charge. It was chaos. Everything was disorganized. Without adult supervision, the children got into all sorts of mischief. They squabbled, broke things, and made a huge mess of the place.

I tried to get the kids to settle down, but they refused to listen. I did my best to tidy up after them, but it was hopeless. It was so frustrating. I wanted to get out of there.

Suddenly, I realized that this wasn't a dream at all. I wasn't in a school surrounded by unruly children. I was at work; this crazy place was my office.

Tuesday, March 15, 2016

Everything Is Okay - The Bachelor Is On!

Am I concerned about the violence that has erupted at recent political events? Yes, I am. But at least the people involved are passionate about the political process.

I am more concerned about the millions of would be voters who are more interested in what happened this week on 'The Bachelor' than with what happens in our elections.

The Ides Of March Challenge

Beware the Ides of March. Every day.

Thursday, March 10, 2016

Instagram Interloper

Someone used one of my email IDs to set up an Instagram account. I received an email last evening addressed to that person.

I'm not sure how they accomplished this. Maybe they found a way to hack my email. Maybe my password was exposed as a result of one of some previous bulk hack (publicized or not). Or perhaps they were able to get in using my Facebook ID.

Regardless, I felt that it would be prudent to update my security settings. I changed a number of passwords and added two-stage validation to critical accounts. I notified Instagram that my email ID shouldn't be associated with this person's Instagram account. I also took the liberty of changing the guy's password on Instgram - which was easy since he used MY email to set it up. I figure that if he's the legitimate owner of the account, he'll figure out a way to get back into it. And if he's some rat bastard hacker - or worse, engaged in some type of criminal activity - then I guess he'll have to open an account using someone else's stolen email credentials. He has worn out his welcome on mine.

Be vigilant. The Internet is full of vultures and parasites, people who have nothing better to do than to masquerade as someone else and leverage an honest person's good reputation for their own illicit purposes.

Why Benghazi Should Be Laid To Rest

More Americans will be shot to death today (by other Americans) than died in Benghazi. I don't understand why gun control isn't the main story every night.

Embassies are threatened and attacked all the time. Maintaining a diplomatic presence in many other countries around the world is a dangerous business.

Attacks happened under Carter (Tehran), Reagan in Beirut (249 Americans killed), Clinton (Kenya and Tanzania), Bush 2 (Karachi), Obama. An embassy is a prominent target with high symbolic significance to an enemy. Sadly, attacks on embassies are frequent.

The only reason to keep Lybia in the news is to attempt to discredit Mrs. Clinton. Partisan politics are supposed to stop at our borders.

Tuesday, March 8, 2016

Exit Polls and the Constitution

According to exit polls from the Mississippi primary, seventy-five percent of Republicans who voted today support a temporary ban on Muslims entering the country.

Let that number sink in for a moment. Seventy-five percent.

Okay, I understand that this is Mississippi, but let's not engage in snobbery. I have met some very bright people from Mississippi. I also have certain expectations about American in general when it comes to issues of rights and freedoms.

I do understand that these were Republican voters who showed up to vote in a primary. Primary voters tend to be more "hard line" than the less motivated voters who show up mainly for national elections.

But, wow! Holy mole! Seventy-five percent of these voters think that we should discriminate against people based solely on their religion.

Have these people read the Constitution and its amendments? Do they understand the Constitution? Do they CARE about the values upon which this country was build, values designed to prevent the unchecked and unquestioned political influence that the church once used to calculated advantage in Europe?

If we start discriminating against people based on religion, we might as well just throw the Constitution away - because clearly we don't believe what it says.

New York Minute 27 - Primary Optimism

Today, I saw a young man with three John Kasich buttons pinned to his backpack. Hope springs eternal!

Saturday, March 5, 2016

Why Christie Endorsed Trump

Were you confused when you saw Chris Christie introduce Donald Trump at Trump's press conference on Super Tuesday? You weren't alone.

The two former rivals have worked out an arrangement for future cooperation. Althought the terms have not yet been made public, some details have been leaked to the press. To no one's surprise, most of it has to do with branding.

- The Atlantic City boardwalk will be renamed to Trump Atlantic City Boardwalk.

- The Garden State Parkway will change its name to The Garden State Trumpway; the Turnpike will be called the New Jersey Trumpike.

- Giants Stadium will be called Trump Stadium At The Meadowlands.

- A grand casino and development project will be erected near Fort Dix in South Jersey. The project's working title is Big Dix.

- The New Jersey Devils will change their name to the New Jersey Real Estate Moguls.

- Newart International Airport will be rebranded as Trump International Skyport.

- New Jersey Transit will be become Trump Railways.

- New Jersey's toxic waste sites will be repurposed and donated to a new water company called Trump Crystal Springs.

- The Delaware Water Gap will be developed and renamed to Trump Canyon. Paterson Falls will be known as Trump Waterfall.

- The City of Newark will be converted to an adventure style theme park called Trump Gangland.

- Rahway Prison will become the Trump Immigrant Detention and Waterboarding Complex.

- Princeton University, along with New Jersey's school systems - including some of the best school districts in the country - will be managed under the Trump University brand.

- Barnegat Lighthouse will be called Trump The Barnegat At Long Beach Island.

- The Pine Barrens will be known as Trump Fertile Pines.

- The entire Jersey Shore region will be rebranded as Trump State Shoreline, the longest contiguous stretch of exclusive private beach developments in the world.

- The formal name of the Governor's Mansion will be changed to Trumpthwacket, also known colloquially as Sell-Out City.

It's going to be huge!

Wednesday, March 2, 2016

Sometimes You Just Need A Woman

Sometimes, you just need a woman ... to run your country.

Tuesday, March 1, 2016

New York Minute 26 - Delayed Delivery

Today, I saw a cop question a bicycle delivery guy. The guy stood beside his bike while two bags of food hung from the handlebars.

The policeman asked the guy for ID. The guy fidgeted nervously but said nothing. The cop asked again. I have a feeling that someone's lunch never arrived.

South Of Someplace